Untitled Questions [1] : Vantage Points
It’s 8:00 PM already, still I’m stuck in front of the TV, having a hard time to set the focus of my defective eyes. The TV shows multi-frame shots of a certain bus in front of the Quirino Grandstand. I have no idea what is happening that time. All I can hear is Erwin Tulfo narrating about something.
Makalipas ang ilang minuto ay may umalingawngaw na putok, umuga ang shot sa TV, malamang nagulat ang cameraman. “HOSTAGE CRISIS” ; sabay superimpose sa baba ng TV screen, katabi ng logo ng news program. Ang location : Harap ng Quirino Grandstand. Nilipat ko ang channel, hoping to get better shots of the incident. All I can feel that time is curiosity. It’s 8:30, oras na para umalis ng bahay papuntang trabaho. Makalipas ang limang minute ay nakasakay na rin ako ng bus, di ako nagulat nang lahat ng pasahero ay nakatutok sa TV, di bale na ang ma-stiff neck. Sa bawat masasalubong naming bus, expect mo na ang mga laman nito ay nakatingala rin, nakikinig sa mga kabadong boses ni Julius Babao, Erwin Tulfo, Mike Enriquez at iba pang reporter, nagtitiis sa vertigo habang ang mga mata’y nakatutok sa mga magagalaw na shots sa magalaw ring telebisyon.
Kanya-kanyang palitan ng kuro-kuro ang maririnig sa buong bus. May mga tanong, mayroon nanang nagpapaliwanag kung ano ang nangyayari, nagmamarunong, daig pa ang mga reporter na nasa mismong lugar ng krisis. Bigalng nagpakawala ng putok ang isang pulis, sunod sunod ang putok, armalite raw ang bitbit. Biglang napasigaw si Mike Enriquez, may natamaan ng ligaw na bala malapit sa kanyang kinalalagyan. Isang nagaalalang Mel Tiangco ang sumagot, pinapalipat ng pwesto ang katrabaho.
Mabilis ang pangyayari, lumakas lalo ang ulan, napasok ng pulis ang bus, nagputukan at pagkatapos ng ilang minute, ang mga nagaabang na pulis ay isa isang naglapitan, sumesenyas ng isa, nagsilapitan lahat ng patrol car, ambulansya at mga usiserong nakapalibot sa bus. Biglang nabanggit ni Mike na may granadang hawak ang Hostage taker, pero di ata epektib, tila may piyesta sa paligid ng bus, dumadami ang mga usisero, di bale nang maulanan, makalapit lang talaga sa bus. Tapos na ang lahat. Nakahinga na ng maluwag ang mga kasakay kong pasahero. Biglang segue sa two frame shot ni Mike at Mel, ilang statement from Mike at closing spiel na sabay segue, sa teleseryeng “Pilyang Kerubin”. Parang walang nagyari. Walang follow up interview, di man lang inestretch ang coverage ng kahit mga 15 minutes. Siguro kailangan na nilang kumita, kailangan na magpalabas ng commercials.
Plano ko sanang bumawi ng tulog ngunit di ko magawa, ang daming tanong ang nasa isip ko nung oras na iyon, pero alam kong wala makasagot maliban nalang kung magreresearch ako sa net. Pero tulad nga nga isang kasabihan sa communication theory, there’s a big difference between the knowledge gathered from a collective article AND having an exchange by interpersonal communication.
Ang iba ay mababaw, at ang ilan ay masasabi nating masagot lang ng hostage taker o ng mga biktimang nakaligtas. Pero walang namang mawawala if I write it down here right? [disclaimer/ note : some of my questions may sound insensitive but I just made them out of sincere curiosity]
-Hindi ba naisip ng hostage taker na hindi solusyon sa kanyang problema ang manghostage ng isang bus? [at ang malala pa ay Hongkong tourist bus] He’s a police, I’m sure doing such act will cause him a lot. Lifetime imprisonment. Kung pagbalik sa serbisyo ang hiling mo, why not appeal to the court, be sincere and make your point by presenting more proof that you’re innocent.
-Bakit mga turista pa galing Hongkong? ang ilan sa kanila ay di nakakaintindi ng Ingles, siguro when the hostage taker tried to explain things to them, some of them can’t understand him, all they know that they’re in danger without any reason. Siguro nahirapan ang hostage taker makipagcommunicate. Siguro they’d exchanged thoughts by gestures.
-Bakit sumisigaw ang driver ng bus na patay na ang lahat? Hindi ba niya alam na kalahati ng kanyang statement nakasalalay ang moves ang mga pulis, SWAT at media? Hindi ba niya naisip na maaring ikamatay iyon ng mga hostages?
-Alam ba ng mga pulis o SWAT ang magiging epekto ng pagtapon ng teargas o flashbomb sa loob ng bus? Eh ang mag”spray” ng armalite? [“spray” ang terminong ginamit ni Mike Enriquez during the coverage] siguro kalahati sa mga namatay ay nalagutan ng hininga dahilsa mga ligaw ng bala.
-During the hostage crisis, sa anong TV station nakatutok ang hostage taker? Malamang he got some references sa TV ng bus. Kung sino man ang reporter ng pinapanuod niyang news program, good job, you made it more complicated. But can’t blame you sir [or ma’am], it’s your job. Ano ang huling TV ad ang kanilang napanuod, ano ang kanilang naramdaman nung napanuod nila iyon? Irony?
-Before the incident, those tourists don’t have any idea that a hostage crisis will take place. Siguro naenjoy nila ang Luneta. Siguro nakita nila ang may dugong Chinese na si Gat Jose Rizal na binaril sa likod ng mga kastila nong araw. Malamang may bitbit silang mga digicams tulad ng Sonia, Penesonic at iba pa. Anong kaya ang backdrop sa huli nilang picture sa kani-kanilang sa digicam? Ano ang huli nilang impresyon sa ating lugar? Nakita ba nila yung mapa ng pilipinas sa likod ng monument ni Rizal? Eh yung sunset? Malamang hindi, nasa loob na sila ng bus ng mga panahong iyon.
-Nasarapan kaya sila sa Chicken Joy meals na inabot sa kanila during the crisis? Ang ilan sa kanila ay di daw nakakain dahil sa tension, naiintindihan ko sila. Eh yung hostage taker? Ano ang huli niyang almusal? Kumain rin ba siya ng chicken joy?
-Kanino kaya ang mga pangalang huli nilang nabanggit bago sila namatay o nasagip? Eh yung sa hostage taker? Nakatawag ba sila sa kanikanilang mga pamilya at kaibigan? Nakapagtext ba sila? Post sa FB?
-Saan naggaling ang mga usisero? Ang dami nilang nagsulputan matapos ang hostage crisis, yung may bitbit na payong, pero marami sa kanila talagang binalewala ang malakas na ulan, makasilip lang, anu kaya ang tumatakbo sa kanilang isip? May pinakita pa nga sa TV na babaeng usi, nakapayong, pinapaliwanagan ng pulis na lumayo, kaso nakikipagtalo pa ang babae, akala mo may kamag anak sa loob ng bus.
Kinabukasan ang site ng hostage crisis ay naging instant tourist spot. Nakakapanlumo, sabi nga ng isang ancient saying “Injurea addis contumeliam” [you add insult to my injury]
Mga estudyante ng mga kalapit na university, mga office workers at mga turista rin ang tipon tipon malapit sa bus, hindi para magalay ng bulaklak, kundi magpapicture. Pati mga pulis at SWAT pangiti ngiti nalang, OMG, ang ilan sa kanilang feeling artista habang nagpapapicture ang mga kolehiyala sa kanila. Cute ba sila? Ano ang tumatakbo sa isipan nga mga “post-bloodbath Usiseros”? ano ang profile at shoutout nila sa FB, twitter [at kung meron man, sa friendster]? Di ba nila naisip na ang pangit tignan ng picture ng isang barkadahang nakangiti at ang backdrop mo ay isang “duguang” at basag-basag na bus? Kung sa burol kaya nila magpapicture ang isang grupo ng usi na walang kinalaman sa kanila?
-Ano kaya ang ginawang hakbang ng mga pamunuan ng mga universities at mga pinuno ng SWAT at pulisya? May nagtag kaya sa kanila ng mga pics sa FB? Naging Masaya kaya ang mga usi ngayong nakakuha na sila ng atensyon, hindi lang dito kundi pati narin sa Hongkong and the rest of the world. Hindi lang atensyon, hate comments pa.
While writing this article, I am FB-cruising , suddenly I found myself in a Chinese based FB page containing pics showing students, policemen and some from the SWAT taking a pose, smiling in front of the infamous bus. So insensitive and on my part, I am so ashamed with this one. I know that the government is trying its best to do damage control, but photos like these won’t help, it blurs our sincere apology to HK as a nation. Even though I don’t understand Chinese I know that that page is covered with hate. Flooded with angry comments to all Filipinos in general. They judged the whole nation by the pics of those insensitive people. I know that they have a right to be angry, but not to the point they need to judge all of us? Do they know, understand the whole story? If so , why generalize the whole Filipino nation?
Those insensitive post bloodbath pictures circulated the net with Chinese watermarks, tagging them as future maids, bitches and dumb. Some have bad comments like “why Chinese people keep hiring Filipinos and giving them HK money, they’re all evil” [sic.]. Please stop it, we’re ashamed already and we apologize on the expense our kababayan did to your people. But please don’t be judgmental enough to be called racist. Yes I know many of my countrymen works in HK to earn some money to feed their families but I assure you that they worked hard for it. I am also aware that many HK [many not all, okay] treat their Filipino maids as animals, they lock them without food, worked for days without pay, some turned to sex slave by their Chinese masters. Hindi lang yan nangyayari sa Hongkong, if you’re informed enough, many Chinese Immigrants whose living here our country do the same thing, mistreated Pinoys as if there in Hongkong, they also lock Pinay maids without food, hurting them by clubbing them with whip and hot flat iron, I’m not exaggerating things, I dare you to search the net or Youtueb for clips and you too will be ashamed by the “everyday little murders” did by many Chinese people to our countrymen in HK and here in the Philippines.
My point is, hope that Chinese community don’t judge us as a whole because of those mishaps but rather unite to secure each other. Again, As a Filipino, I do apologize on what happen and ashamed.
I would like to wrap up this post with some questions. What will happen to HK-Phil relationship? What will the Philippine government do to clean our image to the foreign community? Are they going to impose new laws to prevent something like this to happen again? What about the police force? Is there any way to improve their equipment? Is there any way to filter our policemen? To those peeps on those insensitive photos, any ideas to help Philippines do damage control?
I also do think that you have questions to ask at the back of your mind, question you would like to ask to the hostage taker and to his victims. Everyone of us have its own way how to show curiosity and posting questions in a blog is one of them. Well, I found this statement from the net, hope this one will answer some our questions
Well I think this is too much for a personal post.
So Till Then and Godbless 
Reasons
It is easy to lie than tell the reason why your eyes are twitching
It is easy to tell someone your explanation rather than let her understand your reason
it is easy to reason out things which is none sense than apologize
It is so hard to tell hide your emotions when your eyes are twitching
When your explanation is out of peak
and apologies are not easy to compose
It is easy to hide, to mumble and cry
Feeling safe when your down by hiding will not give you any comfort, It’ll just make you more smaller when you decided to come out and feel the summer breeze. later you’ll realize it’s not the breeze that keeps you warms, you’re getting hot by the pressure of inferiority
Unspoken words are something you have to worry about. Words have feelings of their own, they want to be spoken, uttered by the owner’s lips. They want to be sworn like no tomorrow, flattered in recognition and loved because they compose out inspiration. Time will come that words will escape you, abandon you and later on, you’re wont able to speak at all. Pratice to speak your heart out, mumbling is like being a traitor to that person your pertaining to, mumbling is like being traitor to yourself.
Cry is a sign of stregnth not weakness but there’s a very thick line between wining and crying. Tears are more subtle when you’re crying over something meaningful like your friend, pet dog and that toy airplane that defines your childhood. Crying is hard but wining is easy. It make us actors on our own stage, doing so will gain more sympathy and but less empathy.
Communicate in various ways make us human. Convey emotion with soft spoken words, Influence other by these big words and sudden realization by just having a simple talk, gentle to minds, easy for the thoughts. a cup of tea wont hurt you, as well standing by your closest parent, sibling or friend and kill almost half a day just to exchange gestures, talk about so many things, catching up with each other. Time used for doing nothing is not time wasted.
our lips is somehow connected to our heart, so the emotions are raw and spoken words are half cooked. Our eyes are close to our brains, it’ll give away in an instant how we think , how we see things, how we digest certain things.Our left hand is bridged by the heart to the right hand, so we could feel the senses , measure the emptiness of your heart or the space between you and your better half.
(Well just doing a writing exercise while I’m here at work hehe—bad. anyway, it sort of effective to freeverse sonata or poem or short, whatever, the important is , writing activities like this prevents my writing be controlled by my inferiority. I just let my heart do the talking, honestly, I didn’t think any topic at all, I just let my fingers tap some keys and i was surprised that it was able to finish a piece. It’s like I’m doing it while I’m on trance, hehe…)
So that’s for now.
So Till then and Godspeed
No to “buwis buhay” much [Part 2]
Sabi nga nila, “one step at a time”, but I not a fan of that saying. What’s the use of two feet if you can just hop 3 to 4 steps forward? I know it sounds ridiculous [and cheesy] but hey, who don’t want to accomplish everything in nick of time.
Well, I guess I was wrong. Everyone has its own limitations and I just felt it last Saturday. I went to work while my body is aching and my tonsils in wreck. I ended up wasted but the pizza party during that time somehow cheered me up. It came back while I’m on my way home, the muscle spasms became influenza. It’s not a joke being sick, it such a waste of time. Imbes nagawa ko na ang ilan sa aking plano, ay ‘yun, nakahiga ako sa kama, matamlay at nanunuod ng season 1 ng Futurama. I’d rather keep up to my plans on how to be a pop star than stay in bed, torture myself more by thinking what’s my life could’ve been if I were Rob Thomas or Jack Neo.
Anyway, I guess I need some freakin’ rest, but for 3 days? O c’mon. I need to join my team to save some frustrated peeps on how to save their failing gadget. I tried to go to the nearest hospital but the doctor is sick as well, Ironic huh? Then I tried to self medicate but hell, I felt something in my appendix area, I might harm my liver or something so I stopped immediately.
So I have no choice, Absent nanaman ako. I don’t think my boss would be happy about that. But…sigh.
Anyway, as I write this down my temperature went low, manage to ease some occurring muscle pain and still I have a sore throat. Sickness is a belief, which must be annihilated by the divine mind. I promise as soon I get my energy back I’ll do some workout, won’t miss a single pop of vitamin C and give my rest to have a 8 full hours sleep [in other words : less time for Facebook. ]
So that’s for now.
So Till then and Godspeed
Just for now
It’s been a crazy month to start the latter half of this year. Post productions here and Day[night] job there, it’s like doing the same balancing act every day. But thank God, even though I didn’t get enough sleep, I still do enjoy both.
But lately, having enough sleep is getting harder and harder, it is more challenging than the calls I got everyday as a technical support. Well at least, it does not hard identify the reasons why.
First, the call “cenner” paranoia like getting irate callers at the beginning of your shift, escalations, accidents while on your way to work, etc. those fears begins to hunt me every time I’m planning to get a shut eye. Those realizations will be accompanied by “last song syndrome” , horrible is, you’ll not hearing some straight-to-the-hell tunes, but some freaking ambient noise of the office like the collective murmurs of the technicians while they deal with their callers and the repetitive noise of the computer keyboard.
Second is too many thoughts, too many plans, so little time. Many plans are running inside my head this time, from re-editing our digital film”Relica”, some photography stints up to planning to redo my opening billboard and updating my demo reel. Well, I think I can sleep now, must survive the 4th day of the week with a bang, very excited with the weekend. I think I can do some of my plans by then. And about those “call cenner” related nightmares? Well, I think I’ll hug an Avaya-inspired stuff toy, count irate customers until I fall asleep. Hehehe
[about my lil studio’s opening billboard; care to share any suggestions? check out this OBB I'm currently using on my projects ]
Well that’s for now…
So Till then and Godspeed
No to “buwis buhay” much
Such a bummer, being sick for days is not cool at all. Yes, I wished for a long vacation but not like this. I do prefer a Caribbean cruise or something but not being stranded on my bed for days, being tormented with terrible headache, achy tonsils and muscle pains.
Good thing mom was there for me. with her, I tried all medications possible. I tried pills that we think will do, self medication it is but I cant go to the hospital, I’m not feeling well to get out of my bed and even reach for my PC to check my FB. Mom also recommended this manghihilot and I tried a full body massage. it was so painful, I think i’ll get an asthma attack in the middle of the session. Even though the manghihilot is an old lady, my God, her grips are too tight and she can put so much pressure I must. I tried to tell her to make it soft since I’m not that into hilot like my mom. But she answered “mahina pa lang ‘to”.
So I have no choice, I endured the pain of hilot. She found a lot of “lamig” all over my body, even around my eye sockets which is not suprised me since i felt series of headaches these past few days. I think took too much computer radiation. Anyway, I giggled, laugh, perspire and gasping for air during the hilot. I even almost kicked manang when she’s massaging my legs, which I complaint the most.
After the hilot, I called the office and informed them I wouldn’t be able go to work, Sir Jason complied and advised me to take some medications and observed myself.
The next day is a different story, my whole body is aching and I sweat like a pig even though I’m only on my bed. Then I got the baddest headache I ever imagined. I cant check my FB, or work on “Ynvictus” all I can do is set my playlist and turn the volume low and let those songs lessen the pain.
Dave Matthews Band, Tori Amos, Maria Mena, Rascal Flatts and some of Best of College Acapella cuts helped me to sleep away the pain, the next thing I know, I wok up around 11 in the afternoon. not bad for a nap. i felt better. And of the nostalgic event happen to me is when I woke up while the harmonious bridge of Dave Matthews band’s “Where are you going “is playing. So rejuvenating. Since I’m almost feeling well and planning to get ready for work later, I decide to make myself a calamansi juice. It so rewarding yet my cough wont go away. I took medications again and took a nap, I woke up around 7, still got a rough and dry cough. My mom advice me not to got to work and observe myself. Well, have to obey thy parents, that’s one of the ten commandments. I ate my dinner, took medicines and called and informed my bosses. Again, good thing my mom is always there to take care of me.
Anyway, I got a lot of advice within the span of time that I”m sick like settle down on your offs, try to relax a little, less FB as possible and try to check out the local gym. Well, almost all of them have some sense to me and I’m not afraid to considerate.
I dont want to let this thing happen again. No to “Buwis-buhay” much. So guys dont forget to take your vitamins daily and have enough sleep.
So Till then and Godspeed
After a long Hiatus : Burning 6th floor Chairs
Hello everybody, it’s been a while since the last time I posted something here. Well, for some strange reasons, I can’t open my account for almost 2 weeks. Bizarre. Anyway, I supposed to post some articles about animated films featured in Oscars, however something in the news bugged me recently.
I graduated in a four year course, It just cost me four years of hardwork and perseverance and almost 300 pesos per semester, merely 12 – 24 pesos per unit. That’s why I understand why students on my alma matter was so angry on the proposal to raise tuition fee up to 200 per unit. It is a state university, for crying out loud, education should be free however there’s an amount to pay to avail certain academic knowledge. Okay, students back then fought on what they believe in, we do march rally, noise barrage, class walk out and even dialogues with some higher officials. All of them sort of worked that’s why we enjoyed the cheapest/affordable college “tuition” in the country.
What I said earlier, tuition should be free, but dialogues was made and both parties was agreed on an understanding that the tuition that be paid by the students will be used to build more facilities students can use. The government continues to cut our budget, thus paying small amount will help the university stand on its own feet.
But now, we don’t understand anymore why the admin should raise the fee that high. Are they aware of average income of a “mangbabalut”, Janitors, vendors and all blue collar workers who are trying to put their kids to college and somehow, produce a graduate regardless of their income? Are they aware how hard to see your parents work hard just to pay your tuition, produce your baon and put something on the table while you, trying to make a suggestion to leave college and find a job just to make things easier for them. Are they aware that a raise on tuition fees may cause family drama, making the tormented for the whole year o may change the kid’s course of life?
When asked why they need to do that, all we could understand is “to improve facilities” and “Huge budget cut”.
In these past few days, students, activists in particular can’t hold their anger anymore, they threw their examination papers, tables and a bunch of chairs out of the main building and burned them. The outrange made into local and national news, It was covered by media almost every day since the day it started. And last night, I learned from a colleague that they got more worse, chairs bungee jumped from the 6th floor of the main building, had a nasty fall, broke to pieces then burn into ashes. Many of those chairs are still in good condition, some claims it is brand new. My colleague showed pictures she took regards the incident. I felt liberated but somehow, I felt something wrong.
Burning chairs aint do anything good. They should know that every chair placed in the building came from someone’s hard earned tuition fee. Even though they are activist, it is not an excuse to do such things just to be heard. Activists once mauled by some policeman, and he’ll cry for human rights. But when they outnumbered a troop, they just beat those policemen to death, not practicing what they preached. Please remember, even though you’re fighting for some intent, think of equal rights, don’t think that human rights is all about your own rights. Going back to the rally. It is so wrong just to burn someone’s effort to put good facility on your school grounds. We’re all educated, we should know that part of our tuition goes to the facilities were enjoying right now; it’s like buying our own chair, table and cubicle. So why burn them and preach about the high tuition fees? I just don’t get it. Please be civilized, don’t just do things because you just feel like it. Please try to attend a class, that’s why you passed PUPCET at the first place, to study and make your family proud. You can help the university by other means. Try to clean the university, spread the word that can boost someone’s morale, try not to write some trash talks and non sense graffiti around the building because you just don’t like the regulations, try to talk like a civilized man, an educated one. Try to go to basics, dialogues do wonder and peacefull arrangements. Be mature. Think of other students who is trying their best to study while someone is shouting outside during school hours; think of those studes that had a hard time to get into school being interrupted by your speech that can be heard after school hours, Before you waste a spray can for a angry graffiti, think of those students painted the university to make it more presentable and clean. THINK THAT YOU”RE NOT THE ONLY PUPIAN ON THIS PLANET. Lucky you have the voice, use it wisely. You’re a part of the solution right? Not part of the problem.
“If you want a symbolic gesture, don’t burn the flag; wash it. “ —Norman Thomas
[Oh by the way, I'll try to go back to regular postings, I just have to deal with my schedule, but what the heck, I'm too excited to share many new things I discovered from the net, from work, and from my hobby, also please be patient for the continuations of those two novels "Mga ulap sa aking ulunan" and "Carousel"..Well see yah, be nice to others and pass the gratitude]
Well that’s for now…
So Till then and Godspeed
Manic {Mun}-[dei]
As Promised, One Blog a day.
Well guys, to tell you frankly my Monday was overloaded with work, work, work, food, and lots of work but still even though this day should be my rest day, I opt to do things that will strengthen my connection in mass media communications.
To start this day’s recap, An update about the upcoming 5th PMC, I am tasked to do some graphic lay-out for the event so guys watch out for those tarps you’ll be seeing around PUP [hahaha--boastful?], anyway, the thing is, my PC got crashed and reformatted last week so still now I have to download all of my adobe installers [I don't know why but my DVD back up of installers won't work--well, I have to be resourceful.] Then followed by getting my schedule and task for the event, and I just confirmed that I would be one of the secretariat you’ll be seeing in the registration, so guys, hanapin nio ‘ko hehehe–joke, just approach me :. We have to wear white polo with maroon belt, for the girls, white top with a sash…again with sash…how cute
Then it’s almost dawn when I got a chance to ditch the office to go to Robinsons Galleria just to meet my college friend Meyr, I have to borrow her camera for awhile because of some certain projects. Well, she’s too kind to let me have her cam for a week, still I have to update her about a project she gave me long long time ago. it’s a series of website for her “business”, actually, I just finished all the graphics and media needed for the website, still, on the CSS coding process
Then jump to PUP to help some of student friends on their AVP shoot about their college. Well, it’s a blast I must say, it’s like doing a production way back when I’m still a college stude. But now I’m an alumna of that university, it is very nostalgic to do student works on your alma matter.
So there you go, that’s my typical Monday, too things on my plate still I can manage to enjoy those stuff because they’re all associated to my passion in Mass communication, so Bye for now, because tomorrow, i have to leave home early, I have to continue helping my friends on their first AVP shoot. I know how they feels about thier first time to operate a camera and shoot something professionally
Photo from my first shot in a professional production [ as an intern of streetpark prod and world vision
then by 4pm till midnight : I’ll be at my callcenter work , time to train my blabber mouth and skewed tongue for me to become a good communicator in near future..:D
That thing you call “Dedication” and me
uhmmm…Happy new year everybody..?
i know it’s too late to wish everyone in blogspace a great new year but hey…please don’t take it against me hahaha…I think I’m overreacting.
Moving forward. to those first time to land on this blogsite, greetings from Amherst Ureiqn and for those subscribed this to their RSS feeds, thanks and I’m enjoyed the last months of 2008 sharing you my ideas.
I noticed that i took almost a month to post new content on this blogsite. and its against my personal reason making this blogsite. it’s like I promised myself to do a hundred abcrunches every morning but I end up doin it when I’m feel having heart attack.
So this would be my resolution [can't call it "new year resolution" for obvious reasons], I will make myself observe my own rules, I will perform every task given to me on said time [and space]. I will create no excuses for everytime i’m feeling tardy and needy.I’m 22 years old now for crying out loud, I have a job and a life, all I need is to grow up more. It doesn’t mean I’ll stop myself acting childdish, I still do that, it’s part of the process [and life in general], I guess in adult terms, it is called “goofing around”.
So there you go, Expect new contents on this site everyday, when I say everyday, I mean EVERYDAY. i’ll post every little thing about my life, reaction to current events, media refernces, and I think I have to expose my nerdy side. And to make more appealing, think every blog I post, are hundred of ab crunches i made in between writing the post. so my theme for this 2010 is DEDICATION.
See you around and thanks for reading and considering my thoughts
Innate Purpose of the “Innernet” : [Scenario Dos]
I’m awake. But still total darkness surrounds me in a vast state. I’m too weak to open my eyes. I’m also too weak to open my mouth. I badly want to gasp a big amount of air but my reflexes are too stubborn to follow a simple request from their master.
I think I lived too much. My wrinkled skin still makes impression to everbody. It’s already 2090 and I’m dying.
Now, I’m lying in a inclined soft bead, I can taste the sterile air in my room so can heard some unfamiliar voices. I moved on finger and suddenly everybody in the room started to shout in tears, I think they’re happy to see my finger glintched. I can feel their joyful jumps by unexplained tremble beneath my bed. Yes they’re in high spirits.
I want to smile still my reflexes are too stubborn.
Then voice starts to approach me, tries to get my attention.
“Pop, it’s me, your son, I hope you could hear me. I’m glad you’re back”, my finger moved involuntarily made the voice broke into tears. Even though I can’t see him, I know he’s trying his best to control his emotions and talk to me, trying his best not to waste that moment.
“I’m with the whole clan Pop, your son and daughters are dying to see you smile again and not to put much pressure, but your grandkids are starting to irritate us, they jump into conclusions and asks many things about you, so please Pop.” Then he laughed. I want to join him and give him a sarcastic grin because of his weird humor but stupid face flexes won’t let me.
Later that day, voices started to talk to me in turns. Claiming who they are in my life. They usually start their sentences with “You remember me? I’m your…”. Even though to them I am sleeping, I guarantee that I’m listening; I don’t know I just felt that I have this enormous energy stocked just for this moment. I’m start to wonder, how long am I sleeping? Days? Weeks? Months?
Those voices tell different stories about me, their first impression of me and how I failed their first-day conclusions. Too bad I can’t remember their faces and those experiences they’re telling, still it uplift my being. The other shared to everyone in the room my antics at work, how I made them addicted posing infront of the camera or in her term “Cam-whores” . They gained confidence on what they are by only facing the camera without inhibitions. Their pics on my blogs served as their primary photo for years, not because of their strinking pose or beautiful lay-out, but for the reason that they’re smiling and in those images, it looks like they’re confident to face the world.
My self claimed daughter came with a story about how my blog changed her life. On her 19th birthday, she planned to stroll around the town with her boyfriend. According to her, she wasn’t able to approach me and ask my permission because I’m still mad at her that time due to curfew issues. All she can do is to wait for my new posts on my net accounts. She’s sniffing around my accounts. Then I posted something that made her guilt stronger. I can’t remember what was that but she’s telling me if not because of that one, she’ll stroll. We learned the next day that her boyfriend’s car were strucked by a bus. Her boyfriend got some bruises but he’s fine, but since then he can’t look to my eyes straight and boy, he went through a lot of things just to gain back my trust.
A cute tiny voice was starting to read one of my blogposts. It’s about her grandparents on an ice cream date. His voice tells me his innocence; he read my entry without any emotions, only with good diction and punctuation, just like reading a menu from a bar. But I kept myself attentive to that voice, to the scenario narrated by this kid. Suddenly I can’t help myself but cry. I want to see my love of my life again. My soulmate, God’s gift to me. I don’t know what happened to her, nobody wants to open that topic. I want to ask where is she but my reflexes won’t let me. I found myself in total darkness, alone but still listening.
The kid brought me into my younger years, the time I found my soulmate. Then suddenly, my life came to me in sudden flashbacks. My first dog, my first trip to Bacolod by ship, family outings, my elementary recognition days, my college days, my prom, my first job, my first payday, my first relationship then followed by fuzzy montage of breakups, my wedding, the birth of my first kid and my first family picture wherein I’m the head of a family now. I just realized I’m not alone at all; I lived my life with my family, friends, colleagues, and series of enemies, aspirations and inspirations. I didn’t realize that many events came and lead and changed the course of my life, I didn’t realized it until now.
The tiny voice starts to blurr, to chop, my heart suddenly slowed down, I felt the tremble, some people starts to rush towards me, checked my pulse and whatever, drowsiness got the best of me, I’m getting weak by the second, so are those shouting voices surrounding me, all of a sudden it was wiped out by silence. Then there’s a striking light appeared in front of me, I walked towards it and met familiar face, she smiled at me, kissed me on the check and gave me an ice cream..
Well that’s for now…
So Till then and Godspeed
21 is just a number for a kid like me
Introduction : Sometime last year, i opened a blog account however after my first post, i wasn’t able to maintain it. I think because I can’t access with my password, or at times, the site can’t detect my email address. Almost a year passed, i got a chance to bump into that blogsite. I was so happy not because of another account about me do exists [so narcissistic], it is because the blog reminds me what am I [when I was young] , one year younger.
I noticed that I was full of hope back then and very excited about life, well my perspectives now adidn’t changed much but it’s really cool to read materials you wrote, then suddenly abandoned then from nowhere, will jump into your present day life, and begins to haunt you , so with no further ado, here it goes…]
21 is just a number for a kid like me
Getting tails, kicks and sometimes ripped conscience
That’s me as a kid.
Yup, I’m still a kid at heart though, but they also tell me that I’m the real example of that guy from New Amsterdam.
It’s so frustrating getting a fine looking goatee. Also I can’t control my child-like attitude. I’m having the hard time to get serious at times when it needs most. My nerves shivers whenever I saw someone touches each other, kiss each other, (and the rest, I’ll leave it to your imagination). I always claim that I’m innocent to those things, reasons to be tagged as the boy preparing for his priesthood.
Kid, yes.
But I took my responsibilities to the fullest; I act like an old man when it comes to money but a toddler when it comes to relationships.
A Todd, yes
But a todd that cares like a kid to his lady, who often takes his companions to field trip, long bike rides, pinwheel races and park bench activities.
So what’s the problem if I’m a kid, if I’m still a kid? I’m already 21 though.
It’s just age.
Yes an age to be ridicule of because I think 21 years is not enough to be a full grown man.
I still devour my self into simple bike ride, tag games, chocolates (a lot!), pinwheel and a childish ways to live life.
21 is just a number.
Laugh now.
Live later
Think later
Enjoy life now.
Kick ass later.
Mock to those serious things now.
Be serious later.
Get higher later.
Self reflect later.
Pray always.
Appreciate things now and then.
See all things whether small and big, to the fullest
Share gratitude and smile as well.
Love yourself.
Love others as well.
Seek advice.
Share advice.
Tell your stories.
Listen as well.
Go out and discover world.
Get in; know yourself better.
Move forward and claim that spotlight.
Move backwards and be proud of your accomplishments.
Find new friends.
Preserve the old ones as well.
Make your own name in your chosen field.
But give more dignity to the one your parents gave you.
Face your fear and let it go.
But build new ones to give you excitement in discovering things.
Seek God. Love God. Learn more about him.
Sense he’s always around you.
Be guided and be a light to others.
Expand your abilities.
Give self confidence to others.
Work so you can support yourself and help your family.
Work for you to gain more reasons to go out and be found.
Take a rest when you need to.
Take a rest; let your body think and self reflect as your mind always did.
Take a rest and let yourself get lost track of time.
Learn how to fall, make mistakes for you to analyze.
Learn to stand or get a rock to hold on. Falling at all times is not good for you.
Learn to shrink, sit or kneel at times, modesty and humility should be considered.
Dance to music, Sing a song, watch a movie, learn to calculate, draw things, dig a treasure, point at things that needs appreciation, be keen, skeptic, keep asking questions, post your dreams to someone’s door.
Swear like crazy, but keep it as you meant it.
Keep this Ode this to yourself.
That’s what you should be doing if you’re 21.
Innate Purpose of the Innernet [scenario uno]
just got from a quantum leap,and by doing so in trance made my future past through in front of my eyes
In 2032, My kid will be approximately 18 years old, If ever it turns out to be a girl, she’ll be named Ureiqn Danielle or Samuel Ureiqn. If it’s a dude, he’ll be named as Amherst Ureiqn or Zagath Ureiqn. [But I think it’ll be better if God will give me a chance to use all those names---so I can have an excuse to form a band out of them hehehe joking aside]. She or He will be in his or her “raging teen hormones” years. My kid can now explore the world and by that it means that he/she is somehow “allowed” to go out, enjoy prom, go to some parties, drink a little, learn how to mingle with peers and lastly, date another being. I think I’m not going to be that kind of parent that will keep his kid away from this kind of social activities. I’m going to be the coolest dad ever. But there will be a catch, my kid should be at home within my given curfew or else, He or she will taste the wrath of a nagging dad [or should I say, a pesky one].
I’ll put my kid to a hotseat, I’ll ask him/her about his/her day, sort of an interrogation I guess, anyway, just to make sure my kid is still my kid and to assure myself that I know my kid better than anyone else did. I’ll the closest guy in his/her life if ever.
If ever I broke my kid’s heart during the hotseat, I’ll keep my apologies to myself and rather, blog about it, I’ll write there my clear intentions about asking details about their adolescent lives. I’ll tell the world my love for my kid, how I want him/her to be and the disclaimer that no matter what he/she will turn out be, he/she will always be my kid…
I’ll cap every entry with an apology from a dad, longing to be with his kid again, to with him all day, just like when the kid is still young and acceptable to be called as a “kid”. Sitting in his lap, telling playful stories and colorful dreams, while father starts build his expectations in his mind, planning on how to help his kid to reach that goal in the future. I’ll retold those stories you use to whisper in my ear when you’re still young. And tell you bit by bit how you grow well in front of my eyes. I’ll blog everything about it.
So if ever you’re in sober my kid, or you choose to be stay in your room, grunting because you think I’m mad and not in the mood to talk to you, well, you may read my passages and assure yourself that I’m still at your side no matter what. I’m just a keyboard tap away , just nursing some emotions hehe [in other word nageemote lang ]…
Innate Purpose of the Innernet
Yes, I’m a self-confessed Internet addict.
I can’t blame myself if I lurk myself too much into the cyrberzone. Being in cyber space for a while makes you more knowledgeable about things that you’re wasn’t aware of before. Also, a chance to seek revenge and release that whole college day stresses by killing some Nordic Myth Character on games or for a while, communicate with your high school colleagues, breaking them some good news like “I got a chance to participate in a declamation contest which I never did way back in high school” or “Hey guys, guess what, I’m not a part of NGSB societal anymore”, and parading some of your new experiences and lessons learned to your friends.
Four years ago, my newfound college friends usually tagged me as “Squarehead”, for the reason I normally spend most of afterhours at the netshop, surfing the net, learning Photoshop and downloading some things you would rather not ask.
I usually consumed 2 to 3 hours hovering the cyberzone, but it is alarming when I caught myself enduring my eye’s pain in starring the UV-ray covered screen for almost 5 hours or more. It came to my realization why I suffered occasional headaches and eye rage.
So, yes, I got addicted to it since then, but I tried to lessen those hours and basically, put an end into it.
My third year in college came and hectic schedules in random made me quite busy and not to lurk the net at times. But still, instances came that the library that usually expected to generate answers for our overflowing queries turned out not capable at all to give us what we need. Therefore, the tasks of scourging answers by hitting the keyboards are innate solution to our problems.
Well, this addiction is hardworking to get back into my system and that’s bad. Good thing I diverted myself into post production, Yes I’m hitting those keys again but now, I’m turning it into gold. Fees regarding my 3rd year tuition , miscellaneous and projects were paid by my Post-Prod job in an agency. That’s good though but since then my jobs always entitles me to work in front of the PC, so I think the net will again eventually go back to my veins.
But recently it came to me some innate purpose of the “Innernet” [like what the call ‘cenner’ agents usually pronounce it]. There are many benefits that you can get from the net, some of them ranges from short term to long term benefits, from society approved knowledge to random bunch of trivia up to believing some conspiracy theories that might save you in “near future” [wink wink.]
So much for an intro [and some editorial] please let me enumerate some of it’s benefits in the near future …
So that’s for now guys.
So Till Then and Godbless
If you only knew Jill
I’ve been reviving this bad addiction. No, it’s not drugs and the sexy three letter word [ and it’s never been ] , it’s about eating BBQs. Yes, barbecues, I’ve been pushing enormous numbers of those in my gut since my Digital cat days [a.k.a Digital Cat video post prod days] and got stopped while I’m in ePLDT Ventus then continued just recently when I got myself pretty lot of time.
I don’t know what’s with eating streetfoods or to be specific, eating charcoal cooked, animal’s internal parts. I think that the chewing part made me addicted.
ahh...Isaw, betamax, Gizzards, hotdogs and more...yum yum
Moving on, I noticed that I’m pushing too many to my gut these past few days and I’m worried of getting some sort of hepatitis or gastroenteritis. Thank God, my buddy Galaxy is also a keen kid when it comes to that. I don’t know if he noticed or do mind about me pointing on his ability, but it do saves us from getting street-like street foods. After watching some TV shows that exposed how some cooked theirs in dirty ways, exposed to germs, roaches and everything you don’t want to think of while you’re eating, it made me reluctant to eat barbecues in random places.
Also, adding to my guilt is my mom who’s been nagging about eating those stuffs and scaring me that I might caught some disease, and after every nag, she’ll propose some alternatives like Palabok, roasted chicken or fried chicken.
Continue to my guilty trip, I notice that my tummy is getting bigger. I think I’m getting a little bit chubby already and it is time to crank those tunes and build my body into shape.
Galax : Is that Jill? Me: WTF...omg, pati ba naman dito me fulcrum agant?
Hmmm…on the second thought, it’ll be hard for me to not eat or skip meals or not to attend foodtripping with friends. I think it’s the conversation made between us friends makes it more difficult. Plus the fact we’re always looking forward checking on that dudette who cooks our barbecues. We first noticed her “beauty” after Galaxy and I indulged ourselves to the CHUCK series, and turned ourselves in to CHUCK geeks. We named her “Jill” because looks like Chuck’s Ex turned Fulcrum agent. It became a habit that every time we’re craving for the toasted/burnt meat on a stick, we instantly pop the quote “Tara, kina Jill tayo” [let’s go at Jill’s]. and that habit made some of our friends think which of us two, like that cook lad. Ending up, Galaxy and I pointing each other, trying our best to push one another into the lion’s den . Poor Jill, she’s not aware that we named her after a fulcrum agent, or worst yet, a subject of someone’s “affection”. Haist. We apologize Jill…oops, is that your real name?
Well…A bounty foodtripping with friends is fun, it gave us chance to experiment on some dishes, claiming our “innate” talents as cooks or made us enjoy spend money and eat by the playground, and take pleasure in having each other in a conversation, that’s why ever week, I always look forward for a foodtrip weekend…
OMG, how can I loose much weight? Hmmm…and how can I prevent myself to be a “big” glutton? Hahaha LOLz.
Caught Camwhore
PROLOGUE
Tita will spend the entire holyweek in her hometown, up north of Luzon. I didn’t recognize her when I first saw her, I don’t know if it’s my fault (whether my photographic memory failed me bigtime or my vision is not serving me right). Anyway, she didn’t recognize me either; it’s been years since the last time we see each other.
Tita had to made a whole day pit stop at our place; luckily I have an extra bed space, an opportunity to catch up with each other. Tita saw my collection of books ranges from Filipino Literature Classics (like Benjamin Pascual, Ricky Lee and Lualhati Bautista), rare infamous novels (Paul Zindel, Richard Adams) up to Specialty books.
She scanned the titles in my mini shelf, pulls them off when the title made her interested, scan the synopsis at the back cover then grin or smile or look blankly and return it in place.
I just let her grab some books as I read the book hanging on my reading sched, “ I never loved your mind” by Paul Zindel. She looked at me, praised my love in to books come to think, I’m a guy (she thoughts it’s rare, but I think it’s not), a graduate (some she knew never touched a book after they got their diploma) and lastly I’m in the , according to her, “gimikero” age.
Well, in defense, I answered, some of the authors are male, so why bother the reader’s gender, next, having a diploma doesn’t mean you have to stop imagine new worlds, explore new plots and linger crisp pages and lastly, reading a book is more productive than drinking in bars, dancing in loud music and stroll, why you bother to do that when you can read a book and invite a friend and have an intellectual masturbation (sorry for the term, let me rephrase that, having more conversations that relies in fruitful intellect) One of my bad habits is reading against the light, having my book like 5 inches from my face. Well, I like to linger every page, letter by letter, seeing every detail of the plot, even the ink trails of the print. Tita asked if my vision is still good. I gave her a no, and she left the room with a smile in her face.
——————————————
Two hours later Tita came back with an ophthalmologist, She told me that the way I read books is a bad sign that I’m starting to lost my damn vision.
The specialist let me undergo in some tests, like reading a chart in a distance, that chart with a big E in the top portion. Color blind tests and more.
After almost an hour, the specialist let me wear that weird looking glass with measurements in its eye rims. It’s time to scale my vision. They got 110/120 vision. Uneven, that explains my headaches and nausea.
My vision starts to blur last year, I think December.
Not sure, though, I started having vision troubles while I’m having my training for a new account, facing the computer almost over 12 hours of our day life.
Like the outstanding balance that not paid, my vision accumulated problems for over 2 months. I’m having difficulty in reading digits of my clients’ various bank accounts.
I can’t sacrifice my health, a sudden realization that lead me in a sudden decision. I have to resign.
——————————————
My resignation letter cooked almost 2 weeks in the pot, planning can be easy but execution could be hard and aftermaths are inevitable.
But I have to….
——————————————
As I walk towards my team leader with my resignation paper in one hand, I took a glimpse of my teammates.
Snapshots of the last Christmas party shuttered at the back of my mind.
Well having a losing vision scares a lot, it makes me cringe when it taps my consciousness, I’m scared of living in the dark, hearing only voices, afraid of the conclusion that I might not trust anyone as I would to my remaining senses.
Scared that people around me might fool me and squeeze the being out of me, I might be a nutcracker like those in Hallway # 7. Ten steps before our team leader.
Kath gave a “sad” smile, she was shocked by my decision…as planned, she and almost the whole team, didn’t saw it coming.
——————————————
After clearing all my post and things, I bid them goodbye and got out of the building. Sad, yes, not because me leaving but sad with the fact that my memories with them is in blur in my memory and I blame my weak vision for that.
All I can do to save their faces from growing blur is to look at the misadventures and candid moments kinetographed with my mobile phone’s camera.
Almost two thousand photos help me not to forget those experiences, those faces, that favorite building, Ortigas and the slice of life that once got into my system.
Well goodbye for now, I’ll never forget your faces as long as these photos can be detected with my corneas and brainwaved to my sensory nerves.
EPILOGUE
The specialist confirmed to me that I’ll be having my glasses 2 weeks from now, have to wait long because they’ll put my requested anti-radiation feature (just what I need as I work as a full time video editor and blogger,—( this benchmarked journal)).
Feeling lonely, got scared that I might not see my future wife if I don’t find her. I wish my vision is still there, perfect and not blurry, good enough to see my wife’s face and how it lighten up by sunshine.
Single buds carnival mood swings
There are only 2 common perceptions about a bachelor, it’s either he was enjoying playing around or he’s a sissy boy.
“That’s shallow!” Rye told me.
A guy wants to be single because he wants to reserve some time for himself, to know thy self better, realize his dreams and knowing his purpose in life.
Rye and I shared a couple of beer last Saturday, knowing it’s the day when everybody seems to lavish roses and chocolates, we decided to stroll around UP and share some couple of beer and have some good talk.
We talked about a lot of things:
-the typical “which came first, the chicken or the egg” thing
-gray or grey
-The Sarah Silverman show or that new reality drama/comedy hybrid of Lisa Kudrow.
-The Soup or the The Dish
-Guitar Hero
-to use or not to use “capote” (typical)
-cars (as usual answer: honda Jazz, red)
-oasis or trim
-Kolehiyala girls or Cowboy type lads
-what are the signs that you’re a:
-gay, straight or taken, a lad was a straight or lesbie? or psycho?
-some nonsense things
-what’s better, Circle or MOA
-Bike or Go Karts
-Single or with Sidecar
-ideal age to get married.
We almost got a bit of all topics a normal homo sapien can think just to keep the helical communication theory moving and working. He asked me if I would go for a hard drink, I disagreed, i just hate hard drinks ’cause it usually shorten the time of ability to talk about things. I’m into the typical cervesa because it never fails to make any conversation worthwhile and long than a typical chit chat.
Yup, we’re just single guys wondering literally and figuratively, Rye and I wonder what will happen 5, ten or 20 years from now, we will die young? can we make our dreams come true? how many beercans we will contribute to the pollution someday? and last, what would be the best way to find that someone, the person who will be our side at the rest of our lives. We can only do is to wander and that’s all.
Our cervesa powered talk was moved in QC circle, we rented some bikes, hitting the pedals would lessen the currently over taking power of 10 beer bottles. As We toured around the place, we saw many single buds in different moods, there’s a guy that contents himself with a walk, a guy reading a local comic book (laughing his heart out not caring about what other might think) , a guy silently looking towards the sky waiting for something not for someone, a guy chewing his gum, thinking where to spit it….and so many single buds that’s also celebrating that day as happy but deep inside tormented singles.
Guys often pour their emotions out when they’re accompanied by their closest, bud and or a beer. but at times, a man can settle things out by giving himself a good chair, good position to stare to the blank sky and a chewing gum.
We guys comes in different packages with different moods to swing on, we can be the jolliest person in town but the most tormented one around, we can be the “hell-I-care” guy but the only person who normally checks on you (even in the strangest way)
It’s dark already when we decided to go home. we better do before mosquitoes celebrate over our “meatbags” (thanks for bender of FUTURAMA” for the term hehe)., he thanked me for accompanying him that day, for the chance of going out with him even though I can celebrate the day with my current ex. (the truth is, my ex already had someone to go out with). I do returned the gratitude and politeness of Rye by a brotherly salute.
before calling it a day, he gave a thank you gift, the Poetry and Aeroplanes album by Teitur.
I already heard the song poetry and Aeroplanes but I never got any songs from the same artist again. “Poetry and Aeroplanes” helped me to cope up with things a single guy normally has. Teitur’s composition taught me that I’m not the only one alone who’s afraid to love and lose, to undergo the same procedure all over again just to learn. others says that there’s nothing wrong in hurting yourself with some mistakes as long as you learn, but the question is… are there some other ways to learn? what if you’re already tired but never learned at all? can someone call me BOBO or something?
“Alone in these strange beds
I think that I’ve traveled enough
Poetry and aeroplanes
I am tired of waiting for love”
Yup, not all time we can ditch ourselves into the black hole just to look for that thing—- there’s a time you gonna say “I’m tired, enough of this” and your final resort is to wait…
“Tend to fall asleep in the fast lane, in the fast lane
Sometimes sinking low in the high life, in the high life
No more happy songs of heartbreak, oh’ heartbreak
Or playing white knight misunderstood, misunderstood”
Even though waiting can’t harm you, can’t bring you heartbreaks, misfortune, middle of the night conversations , pimples and ability to lie, it only lessen your ability to know yourself better, Am I the best guy around? Am i mature enough? are all of my decisions right? What would it be with someone else? am I a good partner? Am I going to be a good partner?
Waiting also let others misunderstood you, Society might label you between the 2 common perceptions about a bachelor, either enjoying playing around or a sissy boy.
“Alone in these strange streets
I think that I’ve walked them enough
Poetry and Aeroplanes
I am tired of waiting for love
Another night I lie awake
In woken dreams of faith and fate
Hope my love don’t come too late”
so one question… can you still wait or step your foot forward the black hole and fall into the something you, yourself are not aware of?
The weight of All
I’ve been listening to Matt Nathanson for almost a year, his songs keeps reminding me of a specific person, she was very close to my heart, too close.
I didn’t remember myself waking without thinking of her
I don’t know, even though I haven’t heard anything about her these past few years.
She’s the only one I’ve been waiting for.
If I get a chance to see her again, I’ll make a lot out of it. I’ll tell her how I miss her smile, I’ll sing the pain of not seeing her and I’ll shed the tears of happiness.
Well I don’t know how it can be possible but until now I’m still hanging on.
She’s the only reason why I’m still waiting, breathing and living my dream.
Well, at times, the forces of nature, turntable of fate and the never ending spin of the consequence bottle makes me think to surrender, let go and let myself convince that everything is a false hope…
IN OTHER'S PERSPECTIVE